Why Are Personal Relationships Important?
Relationships of any kind play a huge part in the happiness and fulfillment of your life. Whether it is a romantic relationship with a significant other, a family relationship with a parent or sibling, or a life-long friendship, having people surrounding you who you can trust, count on, laugh with and feel supported by is an integral part of a truly happy life. Relationships go far beyond having people to “hang out” with, and the benefits go beyond helping you to feel less alone. While those are two huge benefits of having a community, they are not the only. Keep reading to learn the importance of personal relationships and how having people in your life can lead you to a place of completeness and joy.
The Importance of Healthy Relationships
As human beings, we all have an inherent need for community and companionship. From the moment we are born, our emotional and physical health and well-being is dependent on our initial attachment and connection. That need for companionship and relationship continues on into adulthood and shapes who we are as people and how we succeed and thrive in our lives. So much of life is personal and can be seen as independent; our careers, our hobbies, our home life, our self-care, etc. All of that CAN be done alone and without the help of others, but it doesn’t have to be. And science and history show that it actually shouldn’t be. There are several studies done and several theories established that have changed our understanding of human connection and the importance of relationships; theories about our inherent need for safe connection and how healthy relationships can truly enrich our lives. We all need the support and love of other human-beings more than we realize, and here’s why.
Components of a healthy relationship
Having relationships in your life is integral, but it is most important that these relationships are healthy. Unhealthy relationships can be toxic and detrimental to your overall health and counterproductive to the purpose of relationships.
There are many qualities of healthy relationships, but some of the most impactful of those are:
Reciprocal trust
Mutual respect
Healthy boundaries
Open communication
Leading with love and kindness
Equal effort and commitment
People often assume that these components apply only or mostly to romantic relationships. While they are incredibly crucial in making a romantic partnership healthy and functional, they are also important in friendships and other relationships as well. Without these qualities, a relationship will not add joy and fulfillment to your life. They could, in fact, do just the opposite. It’s important that your relationships are life-giving and fulfilling, because the alternative can have the opposite effect on your health and well-being.
If your personal relationships are positive and healthy, there are many ways that they can benefit you. Here are some of the most impactful:
Decreases stress levels
The stress of life is inevitable. There are high expectations of us in our society to perform, succeed, keep up and thrive. We are all working hard to provide for ourselves and our family, accomplish our dreams, raise our families and make the time that we have count. The expectations are nearly insurmountable, so it’s no wonder that every person experiences some amount of stress. Whether it is debilitating anxiety or a manageable yet uncomfortable level of overwhelm, everyone is living through stress in their life and you are never alone in that place.
Research shows that having healthy and long-lasting relationships in your life can act as a buffer against the stresses of life. The relationships you cultivate can actually relieve you of stress, which in turn lowers levels of cortisol leading to physical benefits such as lower blood pressure and stronger immune systems. Having relationships in your life cannot only save you from the common cold, but it can increase your life expectancy. On the other side, having a lack of community or increased isolation can deteriorate your mental and physical health significantly and lead to many health risks.
2. Gives you a greater sense of purpose
Through life, we’re all searching for our “why”. What is the driving force that keeps us moving when we don’t feel like we can? Why do we want to push ourselves in our lives and careers? Why are we here and what is it all for? When we live life alone without healthy relationships, it is so much easier to fall into a place of hopelessness and defeat. In the moments when life truly knocks you down, it’s harder to find a reason to pick yourself up when there is no one who needs you. Among all the positive effects that relationships can have on your life, this is one of the most important. To know that there is a greater reason than yourself to keep going, can actually carry you through some of the darkest moments. When you are in healthy relationships, whether they are romantic or otherwise, there are other humans that are depending on you and whose happiness is intrinsically connected to your existence. Knowing this can give you a reason to keep pushing when you’re tired, to keep moving the needle when you feel stagnant and to keep pursuing the very best version of you. Not just for yourself, but for those who love you. Having a greater sense of purpose in life is the goal and healthy relationships can lead you there.
3. Encourages personal growth
Going through the difficulties of personal growth and all that it entails, is so much easier with someone by your side. Not to carry you or force you to keep going, but to support you and cheer you on. Think about someone running a race: there will be a significant difference in their ability to run in a packed stadium with the voices of their support system shouting encouraging words, and running in complete silence with no one there to watch them. While it is important to possess drive, motivation and the ability to pursue goals without the need for the reassurance of others, it is equally important to nurture relationships and have other people in your corner to support you along the way. Having the individualist mentality can be a good tool when used intentionally, but it may be at your own expense when focused on too much. Having a foundation of strong relationships will also encourage you to take greater risks and make greater leaps. Knowing you have people who will catch you and offer unrelenting and unconditional support, can give you the reassurance to push yourself more.
4. Builds a sense of community
Research strongly shows that humans were not meant to be alone. As long as we have been around, we have been born into communities. Whether it is villages that work together, families who live in the same house and raise one another or the bond of an immediate family that you are born into, community and togetherness has been our natural state since the beginning of humankind. There’s a reason they coined the phrase, “it takes a village,” and that is because some of the hardest and most transformative experiences of your life can be made significantly easier through the support of a community. Grieving a loss, adjusting to a huge life change, raising children, and building a life are just some of the experiences in life that can be eased through having a hand to hold. It makes sense why now, all these generations later, we still thrive better when we belong to a community, team or even just individual personal relationships. Having social relationships through work, school, hobbies or otherwise builds a sense of community. That community helps you to feel like you truly belong to something and combats feelings of isolation and loneliness; two things that are a burden to your health and wellbeing.
How can you build healthy relationships in your life?
Cultivating personal relationships in your life is important but knowing how to do that can be challenging. If you have been living a more isolated life and lean more toward the introverted way of living, it can feel uncomfortable to create friendships or relationships with those around you.
If you’re looking for ways to establish friendships, here are a few tips to help support you:
Nurture your current relationships
If there are already people in your life that you love and value, it is a good idea to try and put more of an effort into those relationships. Try to make more phone calls to check in, make plans to see them more often, show interest and concern for their life and make sure they know that you care about and value their place in your life.
Seek opportunities to meet people in the community
All around you there are groups, social events and other gatherings for people that offer a perfect opportunity to see new faces and put yourself out there. This can be anxiety-inducing and intimidating if meeting new people is not your strong suit, but it can be a necessary opportunity for so much growth. You could do something like join a group, pick up a new hobby, start a class or go to a public event. If you are pursuing these opportunities in things that interest you, most likely the people you meet will share those same interests. Pushing yourself out of your comfort zone can be scary, but it can also be extremely beneficial and well worth the effort.
Pursue personal relationships with classmates or colleagues
If you look around at those who are already in your life, you will probably see coworkers or classmates. Those coworkers and classmates are faces you see almost daily, but also may not have a personal relationship with. Nurturing relationships with coworkers can be such a positive choice, as they are people you see frequently and people who you already know and trust. If you have a classmate or coworker who seems like someone you would click with outside of work, don’t hesitate to reach out and suggest spending time together outside of work or even just making a more active and intentional effort to connect when you are at work or school.
Takeaway
Fostering healthy relationships in your life can make an impact deeper than most realize. They can improve your mental, emotional and even physical health and well-being. While it can sometimes be easier to fall into a place of solitude and independence, getting out of those habits and your own bubble is well worth the effort. When you have people around you to “do life” with; people to be your companion, your cheerleader and your confidant, you are more likely to succeed and have a better quality of life. If you’re reading this, take it as your sign to get out of your comfort zone and nurture some new or old friendships – you won’t regret it.